Active Beliefing
Our beliefs act as boundary conditions for our senses of perception and interpretation. They are often grouped in clusters, with one set of beliefs about ourselves, others, and the world supporting additional beliefs. Some beliefs may be valid or useful, while others may be limiting or debilitating.
Beliefs tend to be very highly immune to change. The defense mechanisms around core beliefs, the fundamental set of beliefs from which others arise, are capable of subsuming almost any direct threat in such a way as to leave the core belief unshaken. Because of this, attempting to transform belief from something you are subject to into something you have a hand in designing requires indirect methods that soften and relax beliefs.
Within the set of techniques arbitrarily termed “neuro-linguistic programming,” there is a powerful tool for active beliefing called “reframing.” Reframing involves taking a belief and running it through a series of test questions to determine the belief’s validity. This can be most effective when used upon limiting beliefs. A limiting belief can be defined as a belief about your capabilities, the responses of others, and what is possible in the world that has prevented you from taking action. Examples would include “Someone from my town will never be respected,” “I can’t possibly become a doctor at 40,” and “It is too much work for me to become successful.”
Reframing can be done individually. However, it often works most powerfully with someone else. While working with the following exercise, consider recruiting a trusted friend or fellow Initiate to work with you in person or via tools like Skype or Zoom.
Reframing
Spend some time thinking about the things you belief about yourself, other people, and the world that you currently suspect might be holding you back from fulfilling your Desires. Write down three key beliefs you discover. Tell the first of your beliefs to your coach, or say it to yourself out loud. Then, have your coach ask you the following questions:
Source Reframe: How did you create this belief? Where did you pick it up?
Categorical Reframe: Is this belief true for all people or situations? Are there examples of those for whom it is not true?
Life Reframe: What will happen to you if you keep this belief for the rest of your life? What will your life be like in 10, 20, 50 years if you hold onto this belief?
As each of these questions is asked, consider them and respond to your coach or yourself. Try to keep these brief, one to two sentences, so you do not start defending your belief. Work through the source, category, and life reframes in this fashion.
If you are working with a coach, have them state your limiting belief back to you as if it were their belief and see how this feels. Often, this highlights how limiting the belief has been and will continue to be if left unchanged. Also, if working with a coach, once the overall process is complete, switch roles and help them gain new vantage points on their limiting beliefs.
As you work through this process, check in with yourself for any sense of shifting in your beliefs or feeling of unease or elation at putting these beliefs in clear focus for a time. Often, these sensations are pivotal moments when new beliefs can be formed as the old ones lose their stability.
Belief Changing
Unfortunately, for many, the only time they can gain enough leverage over their beliefs to change them is when they finally realize that the consequences of their beliefs are too significant. Many people will continue to believe that their actions, known to kill others, are doing them no harm until they receive their first serious medical scare or worse. When engaged in active beliefing, you must develop skills at gaining leverage over yourself to create change.
Changing beliefs works best as an additive process. Things cannot be removed from the mind once they are within it. Short of serious injury, the mind rarely lets go of anything it has grasped. However, new information can be taken in to drown out disabling beliefs.
When you have identified a set of disabling beliefs, look for evidence in the world that contradicts these beliefs. If you have beliefs that limit what you think you can achieve, look into the lives of those who share a similar background with you or who had the outcomes you desire in life. If you have beliefs that limit your sense of other people, look for examples of others who have done things that inspire and contradict your beliefs. If you have beliefs about what can and cannot be done in the world, look into empirical data around such outcomes and see what actual evidence exists.
Identity Shifting
The most durable and debilitating beliefs are often beliefs about identity. The limitations that we place upon ourselves often take the form of “I can’t,” “I shouldn’t,” or “That’s not me.” These identifications are supported by networks of beliefs that can be treated as any other beliefs.
The first line of softening beliefs in this area comes from facing questions. Whenever you run into can’t/shouldn’t style beliefs about yourself, start asking questions. What is preventing you from doing these things? What would happen if you did them? See how much agitation even questioning these identifications can cause.
The next step is to start to transgress these beliefs about identity. When these identifications deal with limiting your behaviors, say a belief about being afraid of heights, start doing things that contradict this belief little by little. This will provide you with new, contradictory lived experiences to draw upon that will help undermine your identifications. This will make your identifications more flexible and help create a new space in which you can grow and develop.
Setemheb 